i had a moment of self-actualization in the tanning bed the other day.

which is why you will never be able to talk me out of going.  you’ve tried a million times.  and you will continue to fail.

it’s time for me to start becoming a more classy lady.

less american eagle.  more anthropologie and j.crew

less flip flops {specially in winter linds!}.  more heels and strappy things.

less baggy jeans.  more fitted and tailored ones.

less frumpy hair and make-up to work.  more polished and professional looking.

more earrings.  period.

actually, more jewelry.  period.

less judgmental and whiny.  more grace.

less shy.  more friendly and confident.

there, i did it.  a small list of goals for this young wife to turn into a classy and proud trophy wife

some things that taylor said during our girls weekend together:

{as we pass the disney store at university mall}  “i get that disney is trying to even out the races, but for some reason i just don’t like the idea of a black princess.  i just think the white ones are much prettier”

{as we watched 24}

lindsey:  taylor, do you like the blonde girl that works at ctu?

taylor: the one that looks like a horse?

lindsey:  oh, dang.  you don’t like her.  she’s the star of battlestar galactica.  i was hoping that would make you want to watch it.

taylor:  ya, now i never will.  i can’t stand watching the screen when dayna is on it.  what are the really big horses called?  clydesdales?  ya, she is totally a clydesdale.

{as we sit in our booth at zupas; a plus-size girl walks in to order, drops something, and bends over to pick it up}

“it should be required in college, well even in high school, for everyone to take a class called ‘how to dress for your body type’.  then maybe people will know that just because it is in style and it comes in your size doesn’t mean it will look good on you.”

haha really taylor?

what a weekend.

friday night chase and i went to the utah symphony.  it was INCREDIBLE.  i will say that after an extremely long second half, we were both a little ready for it to be over–but it was still just beautiful.  what a great v-day gift!

saturday night we met my family in salt lake and grabbed some indian food to celebrate chase’s birthday.  it was a blast.  the funniest thing was that they had just come from the mc/timp state basketball game and taylor had been given a “timp men’s calendar”.  it was basically a letter from the boys at timp telling taylor that if she was sick of the immature boys at mc, that she could call on them.  and then they gave her a calendar that had pictures of them modeling.  haha!

sunday i sent chase off to san jose, california.  he is speaking at his conference and will be gone until wednesday night….but tay came down to stay with me so that i wouldn’t be scared/lonely.  we found out  that one of our step-cousins had attempted suicide and was in the icu at a nearby hospital, so we spent sunday with family in the waiting room waiting to see if she would wake.  however, around 11 PM it became clear that she wasn’t going to make it and the whole family came down to be there for a blessing and to take her off life support.  it was nice to be there to say goodbye.

monday, tay and i spent the day shopping, eating and watching tv.  seriously, it was fantastic.  a great way to get our minds off of jessica and to relax a little.  i’m so glad to have tay moving down here for college soon, it will be so great to see her whenever i want.

now, just back to the grind at work today.  luckily, i just got a text from chris telling me that nicole is going into labor today!  that means i will get to spend the night oogling over my newest little best friend.  hurry up grayson!

i’m in the market for a new laptop.  and i need help!

mac or pc people?!

{i mean how to you even compare a mac to something that comes in lime green!}

tell me your thoughts…

last night chase showed me the “stats” on our blog.  mostly because i was feeling completely out of sorts and i wanted to see if anyone cared about our little life.  turns out there are quite a few of you who do.

also, it was kind of creepy to see that people in saudi arabia and isreal are getting on here regularly….can you say “framed for terrorists attacks” mabye?  nah just kidding. mostly.

inevitably, it led me to the thought, “should we go private?” to get rid of these semi-creepy visits.  for those of you who have private blogs, what say you?  i can’t really decide, because i get really annoyed with the private blogs i like to follow since they won’t integrate with my google-reader {which is the way i am updated on feeds}.  needless to say i don’t visit these private blogs very often as i forget about them.  and i don’t want people to forget about me!  prideful much? 

i guess that going private would be a little different since we are not on blogspot and we have our own website for our blog.  but i’m sure it’s doable {i mean my husband builds websites for heavens sake}.  i’m just not sure how the invites would work, etc.  but it’s definitely something to think about…

so in the mean time, let me know what you like/dislike about being private or not.

also, it was really fun to see what websites are sending the most people to my blog.  obviously, facebook sends plenty since there is a link on my profile, but there were others that have sent 20+ {hannays, martineaus, frisbys, etc}  it’s kind of fun to see, so if you have a way of checking your blog “stats”  i say do it!

1) it will make you feel popular…and

2) it will make you feel violated

and aren’t those the two best things to feel?

sidenote:  if there are readers from http://mindysbloggy.blogspot.com/ or http://bcmerrill.blogspot.com/, let me know who you are.  you are at the top of my “stats” as far as visits and referrals, and since i don’t know you, it feels weird.  give me some peace of mind and tell me that you aren’t rapists/kidnappers/murderers and/or any variation of the sort.  thanks.

here are some pics of the century ride that we did last weekend.  me and my brammer family ladies (nicki, robyn and marie) rocked out ~70 miles and chase and the men did about 80 before they had to turn around due to bad weather conditions.

it was a BLAST

-why is there such a high price to having long hair?  i look terrible, fat and stumpy with hair above my shoulders–so i keep it long.  but this 20 minute blow-dry every day thing is killing me.  killing me so much that i’m finding it hard to motivate myself to get in the shower very often. i remember this happening before…the week after chase left to china for study abroad.  oh man, i was completely gross.luckily i finally saw the light when my dad called and said he could smell me all the way from logan. too bad it’s his fault for not giving me the genes of curly and/or wavy hair.  life would be so much easier if i had those genes.  i could just shower, ring out my hair and leave with it wet and curly

-if you are chewing your gum louder than the music in my headphones, you should consider living  among cows

-it’s time for me invest in some good fashion.  also, i need to start doing some ‘lindsey’ things again.  take a bubble bath while listening to some good old country music.  dance in my living room singing “the way i live” at the top of my lungs.  meditate.   take a drive up in the mountains and read my scriptures while looking out at the beautifulness that is utah valley like i used to.   make better than sex cake and not feel bad when i eat half of it.  scrapbook?–probably not.  man, why have i stopped doing all of these things?

-please…don’t text when i come over to visit. chances are, i refreshed my eye make-up and lipstick to look nice for you, so give back some respect by paying me some attention. and by some, i do mean all

-i will literally strangle this chick if she interrupts the professor one more time.  her voice is annoying, her face is annoying, what she says has no real value, and i struggle with disrespectful people.  so girl in the blonde up there, watch your back.  i just might follow you to your car and stuff you in your trunk.  you bug me THAT bad

-i’m so glad i don’t have to go to a singles ward anymore.  wow.  even though i don’t fit into the demographic of my new ward {who are all 25+ and have 1-2 children}, it’s nice to have some mature people to worship with each sunday.  to all of you tools out there– do not use your phone during Sacrament meeting. and if you do, i hope God texts away when you’re sad and praying to Him for a miracle. that’s karma

-it’s definitely time for a good spa treatment.  luckily i know the secret to a good makeover is to do it in my own home.  do i have time tonight?  i will make time

man it’s going to be such a good day.

lent has been a disaster for my self confidence.  i started out thinking i would rock it.  and then only a week later was already “taking a day off” of the no-bread diet.  i think i even made a chocolate pudding pie a few days after it started too.  haha.  well, i guess i made too lofty a goal.  i mean, no bread or sugar?  next time, i’ll just choose one so that i can use the other to supplement my loss

it just so happens that whenever i fail at something, my initial reaction is to re-commit to it.  however, i don’t think i will get very much pride if i only finish half of lent.  so i’m just going to have to make completely new goals,  ones that i think is manageable and not too far-reaching.

-be mindful of the foods i eat

-exercise 6 days a week

-treat myself to carbs/sugar twice a week

and -take my calcium, iron and prenatal supplements each day (no excuses!)

i know these are so cliche, but over the years i’ve found that when i start my diet and exercise programs, it is better to start with smaller and more attainable goals and gradually work up to the bigger things.

i’m hoping to be able to compete my first marathon, relay race and century this summer–so i figure if i start now, i will be ready by june for some of these feats, maybe?

someone in our house had his big 25 birthday yesterday.

we were in st. george for our century ride, and got to spend a little time relaxing.  can’t think of a better way to celebrate a birthday.  i didn’t have the tools to make a cake, so i surprised him on sunday morning with a texas-sized doughnut.

we spent the rest of the day doing pretty much nothing.  i took a few naps while chase read on his new nook and then we packed up and drove home.  it was a very uneventful day, but i think that after the crazy busy week chase had just had, an uneventful day was exactly what he wanted.

i wanted to get him some really fun things for his birthday since he’s been such a great husband to me and has been working so hard lately, so i got him tickets to the U2 concert in june, a nook {like the kindle}, and some other things that are still on their way.  i think that the nook is definitelyhis favorite….he has been reading on it every spare minute that he has!  i love giving presents

chase,

i love you so much.  you are such an incredible person and inspire  me  to be and do better.  you have an easy way of putting a smile on my face and i always feel wanted, beautiful and special when i’m with you.   you are the bright spot of  my day and what i look forward to coming home to every night.  i am so lucky to have you forever.  you are my everything.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

it’s been one of those thursdays where i feel like it is friday.

i start planning a fun weekend date in my head for chase & i

i start scheduling out the homework that i need to get done before monday

i start doing all of my “friday stuff” at work

and i start shutting down mentally.

then i remember that it is only thursday and i will have to endure this whole thing again tomorrow.

thank goodness that i get to leave work early today

and that tomorrow i take off with  chase to a weekend away in st. george filled with a bike race, birthday celebrations and empty, quiet condo

otherwise i just might have to quit this day job.

{gayle if you read this, i’m just kididng, not really going to quit}